Choices
by dragonchic
Summary: Set in season one. Scott thinks about two girls in his life, and a difficult choice he must ultimately make. [Complete]
1. Reflection

Disclaimer: I dun own X Men Evolution (everyone faints in shock) I'm not making any money from this so don't sue me

A/N: this is my first Evo fic, and my first romance (I usually write insane comedy). I'm not an experienced fic writer yet (only ONE other fic out there) so don't be too harsh. :o)

Summary: Just Scott thinking about Jean and Rogue

Choices

How did this happen? I had always been so sure about everything. I was leader of the X Men, Scott Summers. And I had a crush on Jean Grey. My best friend. I told others she was like a sister to me, even though inside I knew she was much more. And I also knew that right now, I didn't have a chance with her. She was beautiful, outgoing, and popular, she could have any guy she wanted. So I'd stay in the background, telling myself that my day would come. Someday she'd be mine. So I had to wait. And I was convinced I could do that. Wait for Jean, for as long as it took. But now…I'm not so sure anymore.

And the reason for me not being sure…Rogue. Ever since that day we spent rehearsing our lines for that drama project, something just clicked. She opened up to me, something she hadn't done for anyone else. And I was ready to listen. That is, until Kurt ported in with the news about Jean. As soon as I heard, the connection with Rogue was forgotten, and all I could think about was getting Jean back, safe. I didn't see it then, but I sensed something from Rogue when I went berserk over Jean. Hurt? Was any heartache caused from my obvious feelings for Jean? I wasn't sure then, and I'm not sure now.

After that, I tried to get closer to Rogue, to understand her. She locked me and the rest of the world out. Rogue was the enemy, she was under Mystique's control. Yet sometimes…I got the feeling that she just didn't belong. That she wasn't happy under Mystique. And she never really fought us. Like when Kurt was stuck in the Middleverse. She helped us, and walked out, telling her former comrades that this wasn't her fight. I detected some compassion in her, and that maybe, just maybe, her heart was opening up.

And then came that field trip. I was looking forward to going with Jean. A dark cave…alone with Jean…you get the picture. I'd keep my hormones in check of course, but I was planning to make my move, that is, if I didn't chicken out. But I was tired off waiting; I needed to tell Jean how I felt. I think she has a sneaking suspicion that I liked her, but aside from occasional flirting, she never acted on it. Whether I liked it or not, I'd have to make the first move. And I thought this field trip might work. But then my plans were ruined by Principal Darkholme, whom I'd later learn was truly Mystique. She replaced Jean's spot with Rogue, on some "too many absences" excuse. At first I was angry, but then I realized that maybe instead of reaching out to Jean, I could use this to reach out to Rogue. But to my surprise, she ended up reaching out to me. She saved my life when we were trapped in that cave. And If she hadn't told me to open my eyes, the X Men would have never seen my optic rays, and they'd never have found us. So I was doubly in debt to Rogue.

After our little chat with the professor about certain secrets, I found myself outside Rogue's door. Knocking as a warning, I let myself in. Rogue was a little surprised to see me, but moved over and let me sit by her on the bed. I had only gone in their to see if she needed any help adjusting to life with the X Men, but suddenly, she poured her heart out to me. She told me about her past life, how she had been deceived by Mystique and the woman who had raised her. But most off all, she cried her heart out while telling me of the depression of knowing you could never touch someone, never kiss your lover, never hug a friend. And she's right, that does suck. But it's not like I don't totally understand how she feels. No one would ever be able to see my eyes. They're blue, and of course I could tell someone, but they'd never see them for themselves. And then there is the downside of forever seeing the world in red. I always hated that. But I made the best of it. Jean's hair was red, I could see that, and her eyes were green, her shirt was pink, and she had khaki pants on. But everything was seen in shades of red, that color that almost drives me insane at times. I wish I could see her as she truly is, not imagine what she really looked like. Her beauty was never lost on me, even though I couldn't see her true colors. She's beautiful, no matter what color she's in.

After Rogue cried herself to sleep, I quietly crept out of her room, and into mine. Which brings me to where I am now. Thinking. About Jean, and what I've always felt for her. And about Rogue, and what I'm starting to feel for her. Jean has always been the apple of my eye, that unreachable woman that always seemed out of my league. And Rogue…I feel this strange connection to her. I can't explain it, but the feeling I got in the pit of my stomach while she cried in my arms was something I never felt before. She's not the prettiest girl I've seen, but she has an inner beauty and strength that seems to radiate from her. They're both wonderful girls, who I could be equally happy with. No…that's not true. I know that a relationship with one of them is meant to be, but the question is, which one? It should be an easy choice; I should have a gut feeling that just tells me what to do. But I don't. I don't have a clue as to whom I truly want. I could weigh pros and cons, consider future options with them, even phone one of those fake psychics on TV. But it really comes down to this, who do I choose, the girl I've always loved, or the girl I'm falling in love with?

heh heh, there you have it. Ugh, I know it majorly sucked, and I'm sorry, but I just had to write this for some unexplainable reason. So who's Scott gonna choose? Hehe, I'm not telling :-P You'll have to read the next chapter. And please review people, I'm not gonna continue unless you tell me what you think.


	2. Final Decision

Disclaimer: I dun own X Men Evolution (everyone faints in shock) I'm not making any money from this so don't sue me

A/N: this is my first Evo fic, and my first romance (I usually write insane comedy). I'm not an experienced fic writer yet (only ONE other fic out there) so don't expect much.

Summary: Just Scott thinking about Jean and Rogue

Choices (part two)

"Mr. Summers!" A loud voice suddenly cut through my thoughts. Looking up, I saw my math teacher scowling at me. Crap. Caught daydreaming in class again. She wasn't going to be happy. But might as well try to act innocent.

"Yes Mrs. Druker?" I said in my cheesiest, perfect teacher's pet voice. Not surprisingly she didn't fall for that. "I'd appreciate it if you'd concentrate on the task at hand instead of zoning out."

"Yes ma'am," I meekly replied. Ugh, I have to get my mind off of Jean and Rogue. Ok Scott, concentrate. I looked down at the worksheet in front of me and groaned. Differential equations. _Fun_.

Dumping my books in my room, I wandered out into the hall to see if any other X Men were home. A loud shriek followed by an annoyed grunt told me that Kurt was up to his old tricks with Kitty again. Rolling my eyes, I looked out the window to see Rogue sitting under a tree. Curious, I descended down the stairs, and walked outside. Careful to be as quiet as possible, I snuck up behind Rogue and peeked out from behind the tree.

In Rogue's hands was a sketchpad. Her slender fingers firmly gripped a pencil as it made soft strokes on the paper. Every now and then she'd reach up and brush a loose strand of white hair out of her eyes. Man that hair…I always wondered how she got that. Was she born with it, or did she dye it? Or maybe it was the result of a traumatic experience. When a person undergoes something that is very shocking or traumatic, their hair can lose pigmentation. I frowned. It wasn't hard to believe that Rogue had gone through one, if not many traumatic experiences in her lifetime. Maybe that's why she shut herself out from the rest of the world. I just hope she'll let me, or at least someone else get close to her. A life of solitude would be miserable.

I leaned over a little to see what Rogue was drawing. What I saw was a typical domestic scene. A father, holding a baby girl with brown hair, with her mother standing next to her and smiling. Looking closer, I saw that the girl's hair was partially white. Realization set in. Poor Rogue. This was probably wishful thinking on what her childhood could have been. I took a step forward and a twig cracked under my foot. Rogue jumped up, surprised. "Who's there?" she demanded. Her eyes widened when she saw me, and a reddish tone came to her face. "Uh Scott, ah uh, ah didn't know it was you. Ah'm sorry."

I smiled and gestured to her drawing. "That's very good."

The intensity of her blush increased. "Thank you," she stammered. Smiling again, I looked at my watch and realized I was ten minutes late for my study session with Jean. "Oh, I gotta run Rogue, see ya around." And I was off, running towards the mansion, turning around once to wave.

"And so Trotsky was Stalin's chief rival for succession after Lenin in the Russian Revolution." Holding my head in my hands, I struggled to cram all the information Jean was giving into my head. I had been zoning out in history a few days ago and didn't hear about the test on the Russian Revolution tomorrow. Fortunately, Jean agreed to help me study. And so I ended up here with at least five huge books spread out in front of me, trying to make sense of Bolsheviks and the Intelligentsia. "Now who ended up leading Russia into communism?" Jean's question turned up a blank in my head. Ugh, was it Trotsky, Stalin, or umm wasn't there some guy named Rasputin? "Scott?"

"Uhhh, Rasputin?" I guessed. Jean crossed her arms in front of her and let out an exasperated sigh. "Scott, we've been here for over an hour and have made hardly any progress. What's with you today, you seem like, preoccupied or something." Defending myself, I argued, "Hey I've been concentrating, but you sure haven't been doing a very good job of making all this easy to understand!" Oops, shouldn't have said that.

Jean suddenly got an extremely annoyed look on her face. "I'm not the one who was daydreaming in class and didn't even know about this test! I'm at least trying to help you, but if you don't want it, fine." With that as her closing statement, she leaned back in her chair, and crossed her arms again. Heh, she's cute when she's angry. But even so, I don't want her mad at me. "I'm sorry Jean, I've just got some…stuff that's been on my mind a lot lately." Jean raised an eyebrow. "Really? What kind of 'stuff'?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I said smugly. Before she could respond, I turned my attention back to the task at hand. "C'mon Jean, we've got one more hour before dinner, help me with this Russian Revolution stuff before then." She relented and went back to explaining Lenin's succession. I tried to concentrate and was succeeding, until it finally got to be too much and I needed something to distract me. Looking up, I suddenly found myself staring at Jean. Concentrating, I blocked out the red tones, and started to see her true colors. Her hair stayed the same, but I suddenly started to see the pale tone of her skin, and the dazzling green of her eyes. Her clothes started to transform as well, and Jean was standing out from a world of red. I focused my attention on her lips. She never told me what color lip-gloss she wore. Of course I never asked, but that would just be…weird. I liked to think I could see the real color of her lips. A perfect light tone of red that accented her features. Beautiful, I thought. Suddenly Jean looked up, and self-consciously touched her face. "What?" she asked.

Snapping myself out of my reverie, I tried to act as nonchalant as possible. "Something wrong?"

"No, I just thought…" she started as she glanced at her reflection in my glasses, "you were staring at me." Frantically, I scanned my brain for an explanation as I felt a blush creeping up my face. "Oh umm, I was just er, those earrings! Yeah, I was looking at your new earrings…they're nice."

"Thanks…" she said, giving me a quizzical look. Before she could open her mouth and say any more, I quickly piped up, "So Stalin was the one who had an affair with the Czarina, right?"

Man. What a long day. It was just one thing after another today. I thought it was over when I left school, but that little incident during the study session with Jean proved me wrong. Lying down, I let my mind drift off into the issue of my oh so complicated love life and sighed. I thought this was simple. I was in love with Jean, and would be until the day I died. Puppy love? Maybe, but I wouldn't know. Then Rogue had to come and turn everything upside down. I was starting to divide my love between the two of them. Jean has always been the object of my affection. And Rogue just seems to need me…to reach out to her, and help her. It's like a tug of war. I'm in the middle, with Jean on one side, pulling me towards her and the life I've always known, and with Rogue on the other side, pulling me towards her and a new, unpredictable life. God! Why did this have to be so hard? Why couldn't I just know who I was meant to be with. She could fly into a dream, dressed in a long flowing white gown, and reach out, take my hand, and lead me off. But so far, that hasn't happened. Some days, I find myself dreaming about Rogue and me, sitting on a hill overlooking Bayville just watching the sunset and enjoying the quiet moment with each other. And other days I dreamt about Jean and well…I'll let that one hang. But there was no clear answer, no one stood out.

Turning onto my side, I thought about my chances with the two. I suspect that Rogue has a little crush on me, which is flattering, but I'm not sure if that's what's best for the both of us. And I really have no clue if Jean thinks of me as anything more than a friend. If I went with Rogue, I'd be playing it safe. I liked her, and she liked me. If I chose Jean, there'd still be that uncertainty as to whether I ever really had a chance with her. Turning again, I buried my head in my pillow and soon fell asleep.

Jean, Rogue, Rogue, Jean. I tossed and turned in my bed as hundreds of images flitted through my mind. Jean and I at a party…Rogue and I rehearsing…Jean flirting with Duncan…Rogue arguing with Kitty…Jean and I at a school dance…Rogue crying in my arms…Jean molding the Professor's face out of clay…Rogue drawing under the tree…Jean and I studying…ARGH! It was too much. The images zoomed by, and I could barely catch a glimpse of each one. Finally, it got to the point that I was about to scream in my sleep, when suddenly, she came through. The images faded away as I saw her face, smiling at me. She wasn't wearing a flowing white gown, or beckoning me to come with her. Rather, she was just smiling at me, almost like looking at a photograph. Every detail about her was clear, from the stray strands of hair, to her lips, slightly parted in a shy smile. Slowly opening my eyes, I awakened. I knew what to do. Rising out of bed, I opened my door and made my way out into the hallway.

I found myself standing in the hall, between two doors. On the left was Jean's room, on the right, Rogue's. I just stood there, not able to make a move towards either one. I took a deep breath, trying to dispel my anxiety and doubts. I was ready. This was my decision. I turned towards _her_ door, and lightly knocked. "Come in," a voice called out. I opened the door and stepped partway inside. "Scott?" she asked, confused. "What are you-"

"Hey," I said softly as I closed the door behind me. "We need to talk."

ooh, look at that, a cliffhanger!!! Hehe. Wondering who Scott chose? Well then…you'll have to wait and see. Go ahead and write who you'd like it to be in the reviews, but it doesn't really matter, since I know who it is. And I guess y'all will have to wait to find out…


	3. She Loves Me?

Disclaimer: I dun own X Men Evolution (everyone faints in shock) I'm not making any money from this so don't sue me

A/N: this is my first Evo fic, and my first romance (I usually write insane comedy). I'm not an experienced fic writer yet (only ONE other fic out there) so don't expect much.

Summary: Just Scott thinking about Jean and Rogue

Sorry this is so late, I've been busy with fics from another fandom. Um this'll probably be really short.

Choices (part three)

I stood in the doorway, as doubts started to set in. I could imagine how this would go over and over in my head and think of a perfect plan, but when it actually happens…my mind goes blank. Guess I'll be making this up as I go. "Ummm…" I trailed off. Think of something you idiot! "Hi."

A small smile crept up her face. "You don't have to stand in the doorway all night." I blushed and stepped into the room. Still unsure of what I should do with myself, I settled on sitting on a chair by her bedside. "So…" she began, "what exactly do we have to talk about?"

I frantically racked my brain for an answer. All that time spent practicing the perfect thing to say turned out to be a waste. "Well…" I started.

"Yes?" she said, that smile still gracing her features. Did she know what I was about to say?

"Um you see, I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. Yeah, thinking." Ugh, how lame did that sound?

"Really," she said, crossing her legs. "Thinking about what?" she asked nonchalantly. Well she seemed to be enjoying this.

"You," I softly said, another blush reddening my face. "And me. Us."

Her expression softened as she brought her eyes up to meet mine. "What about us?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper.

"I mean, well you're a great friend. And I appreciate that." Her expression changed to a questioning one. She wasn't expecting that. "But lately I…want to be more than friends." Her face took on a serious nature, as she stared straight at my face, trying to see my eyes behind my glasses. Wondering if I was staring straight at her, or if my gaze was wandering away. But how could I be looking at anyone but her?

Maybe she's like me, afraid of taking it to that next level. Wondering if we should really go there. I am too, but it's too late for me to turn back now. I started this, and I always finish what I start. "What I'm really trying to say is…well…will you go to the movies with me tomorrow night?" Where did that come from? I was just planning to tell her how I felt, not take her out on a date. Oops.

What she did next totally surprised me. Keeping her gaze locked with mine, she moved to the edge of her bed and leaned forward until her face was inches from mine. Touching my cheek, she gently brushed my lips with a soft kiss. "Pick me up at eight," she whispered into my ear, her breath tickling my skin.

I got up, and she smiled at the silly grin plastered on my face. "Um yeah!" I began. "Sure, I'll do that. See ya at eight!" She went back to reading her book and I stepped out and closed the door behind me.

She said yes! She really said yes! I could barely restrain myself from dancing around the halls. I finally got to my room, and after getting inside and locking the door, I finally let loose with a loud "YAY!" No matter how silly it sounds, that was honestly what described my feelings at the time. I felt like I was walking on air, and that I didn't have a care in the world. I had my doubts about what I was doing, even as I began my little confession. But they were history. I made the right choice.

This was a hard decision. I had two great girls who both seemed to be demanding my affection. I still like the other one though. But I hope that our friendship remains strong, and that we grow closer in the years to come. As friends. I valued her, and her friendship, and wouldn't give either of them up for anything.

Whoa. 11:30. I better go to sleep, I've got school tomorrow. And a date. A grin came across my face again as I slipped into bed. I closed my eyes and snuggled into my pillow. Tomorrow was the start of something great. I could feel it.

Scott Summers fished around in his pocket for another dollar. Finally finding one, he paid for some popcorn and two sodas. Hurrying back to the movie, he could hear the final preview coming to an end. Scanning the dark theater, he caught a glimpse of his date's distinct hair out of the corner of his eye. Careful not to step on anyone's toes, he made his way towards the empty seat next to her. Sitting down, he handed a soda to her and set the popcorn between them. Smiling, she sipped her soda and helped herself to some popcorn, just as he was reaching in with the same intent. Their fingers brushed against each other, and Scott could feel tremors of electricity running up his arm. He felt himself become a little lightheaded and tried to pay attention to the movie, but found himself staring at his date instead. Everything about her seemed wonderful, her hair, her beautiful eyes, and those perfect lips. She looked at him, and blushed when she realized he was staring at her. She gave him a small smile, and turned her attention back to the movie. Scott smiled and turned his attention to the movie on screen as well. 'I made the right choice,' Scott thought as he slipped an arm around Jean Grey and felt her snuggle into him. 'I'm sure of it.'

_Fin_

Well, what did you think? I personally feel there are not enough S/J fics out there, and that we need more. So did you like the ending? Or do you hate me for it? Well tell me what you thought in the reviews. Even if you hate S/J, could you at least tell me what you think of the actual writing? Pretty please? N E way, now I'm off to work on a Kurtty fic!


End file.
